Damn Those Hidden Calories!!

Swirl, Looking Beyong Racial Binaries

For most people, race is still mainly seen as "black and white." Either you are white or you are not. While many have connotations of what it means to not be white, or not be black, very little is discussed what does make those in between. Even less has been discussed about those who are of mixed racial ancestry. In most people's minds, many of these people are not considered white, even if most of the ancestry is from Caucasian relatives. For many years, people of mixed ancestry have been defined by "others", being those not of mixed ancestry, of how we should define ourselves and how others view us. That is why I applaud the people of Swirl. This is a multi-faceted and multi-layered issue that can not simply be defined as it has for many years as simply "black and whites". As with sex (male vs. female), gender (masculinity vs. femininity) and religion (Christian vs. non-Christan), these discussions are often defined and dictated by those in the majority and/or with the most power, all the while relegating all those that do not simply fall into either dichotomy to be largely absent from the discussion. That is why groups like Swirl are ever increasingly important in a society that must move forward. Check out the website and learn something new. Here is some words from the group's founder, Jen Chau.

...In 2000, many of us found ourselves having to explain the idea of mixed identity to others. From strangers to our own families, we have had to answer the questions of people who didn’t believe or couldn’t fathom that we could be “more than one thing” at the same time. We have been asked to choose time and time again — and that’s when we were actually presented with the choice — many times, people have chosen for us. Swirl was created in order to challenge the idea that identity is simple — something that can be discussed in black and white terms. I wanted to create a space where people could find community amongst others who thought about ethnicity and identity in more open-minded ways. I wanted Swirl to become a community of children and adults, young and old, interracial couples and families to share experiences, support one another, and to learn together in order to create change and move us from the borders to a space that was inclusive of all.

While many of us continue to get questioned or see the kind of close-minded thinking that shows how dysfunctional our thinking around race/ethnicity/identity is, there is definitely a sense that we have made some progress. Fluid and complex identities have been lived for ages. For many reasons, although mixed heritage people have existed for generations, we now find ourselves at a time when people are ready to recognize and acknowledge that our country has to account for people who don’t easily fit into one of the five archaic racial classifications (Black, Asian, Native American, Hispanic, White). Mixed heritage individuals are able to check more than one box on the US Census, there are mixed characters in primetime TV shows and Hollywood films, there are more books, organizations, and other resources out there for mixed heritage people, interracial couples, and mixed families. We have made some strides, but of course, there is so much more to be done. With that said, Swirl is committed to growing — both to serve more communities throughout the country, but also to take on more of the work that will initiate big picture change in this country.

We want to change the culture of how identity is thought about, talked about, and lived...

Beautiful and Amazing

As she walks in the room
Scented and tall
Hesitating once more
And as I take on myself
And the bitterness I felt
I realise that love flows

Wild, white horses
They will take me away
And the tenderness I feel
Will send the dark underneath
Will I follow?

Through the glory of life
I will scatter on the floor
Disappointed and sore
And in my thoughts I have bled
For the riddles I've been fed
Another lie moves over

Wild, white horses
They will take me away
And the tenderness I feel
Will send the dark underneath
Will I follow?

Wild, white horses
They will take me away
And the tenderness I feel
Will send the dark underneath
Will I follow?

It Took This Long?

And at this rate it will take a bit longer.

Federal court rules against military gays policy

By GENE JOHNSON, Associated Press Writer 2 hours, 9 minutes ago

SEATTLE - The military cannot automatically discharge people because they're gay, a federal appeals court ruled Wednesday in the case of a decorated flight nurse who sued the Air Force over her dismissal.

The three judges from the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals did not strike down the military's "don't ask, don't tell" policy. But they reinstated Maj. Margaret Witt's lawsuit, saying the Air Force must prove that her dismissal furthered the military's goals of troop readiness and unit cohesion.

The "don't ask, don't tell, don't pursue, don't harass" policy prohibits the military from asking about the sexual orientation of service members but requires discharge of those who acknowledge being gay or engaging in homosexual activity.

Wednesday's ruling led opponents of the policy to declare its days numbered. It is also the first appeals court ruling in the country that evaluated the policy through the lens of a 2003 Supreme Court decision that struck down a Texas ban on sodomy as an unconstitutional intrusion on privacy.

When gay service members have sued over their dismissals, courts historically have accepted the military's argument that having gays in the service is generally bad for morale and can lead to sexual tension.

But the Supreme Court's opinion in the Texas case changed the legal landscape, the judges said, and requires more scrutiny over whether "don't ask, don't tell" is constitutional as applied in individual cases.

Under Wednesday's ruling, military officials "need to prove that having this particular gay person in the unit really hurts morale, and the only way to improve morale is to discharge this person," said Aaron Caplan, a staff attorney with the American Civil Liberties Union of Washington state who worked on the case.

read the whole story here.

Bunnies!! Pets Or Meat?

No it is not the clip from "Roger and Me" in which Roger Moore shows how the downtrodden people of Flint Michigan must survive post the exit of car manufacturing plants. It's the new video from LADYTRON. rroooaahhhh.. I wish I could see these guys on tour again, but gas is killing me on road trips, It's like the price I could pay for a scuzzy hotel room and be scared of where I am when I wake up from drinking! Anyway, here is the video, and David I am sure will say that cause one guy is from Asia and the other three are from Europe that they probably ate the bunnies. Well, they probably did.

That Would Be Life

Nifty Idea for the Kid Who Won't Grow Up

Yeah, I am talking about David for this one. I wonder what else this kid can make? A man that is intellectual, knows how to cook, and give massages would be nice.

Giant Nintendo Controller Table

Tomorrow is the Day

New Death Cab For Cutie album comes out tomorrow. Can't wait for it and when I travel to Dallas to see them. Here is the first single, or you can check out the video here.



AND to top it all off Portishead has finally released their third album after ten years. Their new album does not disappoint, especially since I've waited this long for it. and HERE is there first single. And here is the webcast of my favorite song off the album right now. Amazing.

...And It Begins Again.

The three reasons the Gayzian is Crazy!

A big Sweet Sixteen to my lil sister who is a spawn of Satan herself. Everyone please watch out for this little terror on the roads. If anyone has seen my other sister or mother drive you know what I mean!! Don't worry, I'll be doing all the driving as we head to Tulsa later today to catch the excellent sounds of Tegan and Sara.

Winding Down...Before I Am Wound Back Up.

My memories from this past week (the Arts Festival, meeting Barney Frank, seeing Margaret Cho and Kelly, tons o shopping and working my ass off, and the one who shared it with me) some hot Rooibos mandarin tea, and the cool breeze coming into my apartment with this song make for the perfect close to this crazy week.

Cruelty Comes In Many Forms

Sorry, I am going to borrow from Margaret Cho again, but this posting deserves the time.

Starving Dog in Art Exhibit

I got forwarded this email and I was absolutely horrified. I cannot believe it. It makes me so upset I can't even deal.

Subject: Boycott Guillermo Vargas at the Biennial Centroamericana Honduras 2008

In 2007, the 'artist' Guillermo Vargas Habacuc, took a dog from the street, tied him to a rope in an art gallery, and starved him to death.

For several days, the 'artist' and the visitors of the exhibition have watched emotionless the shameful 'masterpiece' based on the dog's agony, until eventually he died.

Does it look like art to you?

But this is not all… the prestigious Visual Arts Biennial of the Central American decided that the 'installation' was actually art, so that Guillermo Vargas Habacuc has been invited to repeat his cruel action for the biennial of 2008.

PLEASE HELP STOP HIM.

http://www.petitiononline.com/ea6gk/petition.html

It's free of charge, there is no need to register, and it will only take 1 minute to save the life of an innocent creature.

Thank you for your time.

Thank you...

I found this piece from Margaret Cho's blog to be a nice short read for the beginning of the week as we try to tackle the world and leave the weekend behind us...

Follow Your Dreams

I'm having an amazing time on my Beautiful tour, with killer back to back shows this week in Portland and Phoenix, and I was thinking back on how all this got started.

When I was a kid, my family was one of the first on my block to have a VCR. It had wood on it and stuff! Remember when electronics would be encased in wood?! That was really weird. Like they were trying to disguise it as furniture. It was a huge machine, and would open up its big metal mouth so you could insert a tape. We rented movies at this cheap video store two blocks from my house, and my favorite movie to watch was Richard Pryor's "Live on the Sunset Strip." He was so amazingly funny to me, even though I didn't fully understand all the jokes because they were mostly about sex and drugs and I had yet to experience those things. The other film that completely changed my world was Eddie Murphy's "Delirous." As a standup, Eddie Murphy was my ultimate hero. I laughed at that show so much I almost got sick. The "Ice Cream" bit was my favorite. I wanted to be like him. I knew that I was going to be a standup comic. That was going to be my life, and I didn't care about anything else.

I think that we all have the potential to be anything we want to be, and I am living proof of that. I was just a kid, and yet I was able to make my dreams come true and I continue to do so every day. If you love something, I think you have to just do it. Don't worry about what people will say. Follow your dreams, because there is a reason why you have them. They are the path to your destiny.

Springtime fun

One of the reasons I love this season so much has to do with the concerts that start popping up at this time of year. Oh yes, I love concerts and I love traveling to see them. While I might have skipped the "Panic At The Disco" show, I have plenty coming.
Having seen the queen of comedy twice already, I will be be seeing Margaret Cho once again. While I may not meet her again, this show should be awesome since Kelly will be touring with her. If any of you missed my last posting of Kelly, here is her video that she is most known.


I also get to see Death Cab For Cutie which I am really excited. Their songs are legendary to me and their show should be a good one.
.

And finally in June I get to see a good number of bands supporting a good cause. The "Human Rights Campaign: True Colors Tour" will be passing through Oklahoma and I have tickets. I cannot wait for this extravaganza.

Hopefully see you soon.

Spring is Here

So it has been a minute since I've made a post. Well I've been kinda busy. Work is been kicking in high gear with all the catering parties, benefit events, prom parties, and the hetero ritual of celebrating the birth of babies and the officiation of two people in love.
I've also been taking in the beautiful weather as of late, not so much today. Last weekend I was able to hit the Science Museum Oklahoma (formerly the Omniplex). Doug and I had both heard that the Museum had been revamped and had characteristics. It did, but it also had quite a few exhibits that we remembered from our youths, mine being a little further back than his, that were in need of repair. What we did fine amazing was their star exhibit, "Our Body: The Universe Within." I do not have the proper words for the exhibit, but it was amazing and sometimes nauseating, but well worth the 25.00 each. I definitely encourage everyone to check it out before it leaves in early May.
Since we were in the location we, more so me, decided to go ahead and hit the Zoo. Not a wise decision since it was a Saturday. Absence of children is one of the reasons I work in a higher end restaurant. Well, I went from high end to freaking Chucky Cheese. Besides the rugrats, the Zoo did have some really nice new exhibits, including the "Oklahoma Exhibit" featuring all wildlife and plants in Okiehoma. Worth the seven dollars, but go near the end of the day. Doug and I saw much more of the animals as the human ones disappeared. Much more relaxing and peaceful.
On a different day we also hit the Myriad Botanical Gardens which is celebrating being open 20 years. They have a tropical themed exhibit to go along with some recent renovations. It is beautiful. Actually here are some pics I took to help you visualize.







Doug hates pictures so all the ones I got of him were side profiles and that was the only one I caught him laughing. It was nice to get to hang out with someone that can appreciate nature and the outdoors as much as I do. That is not a trait you find in many gay men. More so, he was able to tell me various names and species of plants and birds since he has an interest in them. You want me to shut up, teach me something.
Besides our outside explorations we visited sushi bars, wine bars, movies, coffee shops, and the bars. So all in all it is no surprise I got a little under the weather by the time his four day visit ended on Tues. Well, that and crazy allergies. That and work have kept me busy. And I nearly spent six hundred dollars this week on furniture and art for my bedroom. It looks damn good though. I could right more, but I gotta eat some food and head to work. Get outside and enjoy some green!

Growing Up In The Red Sea of Hypocrisy

So most of you recently have heard (oh please I hope) of the statements Sally Kern made, that were secretly recorded and placed onto YouTube. Even more recently Kern was on Flashpoint and had a debate with my cousin, pastor of The Cathedral of Hope, Scott Jones. The link to view the debate is above. As I was watching the debate, besides the feelings of pity and disgust I had for someone whom was even misquoting the bible from which she assumed her justification for her words and views, I was filled with reminiscence of all my past "conversations" with people of opposing views on race, religion, sex and gender roles, homosexuality, ageism, xenophobia, etc.

Ever since I can remember I have been at odds with the views of most Oklahomans. Not that I haven't done so myself as a younger person, I've always felt something intrinsically wrong with making fun and/or picking on someone because of something they had little to do with, such as race, sex, or sexual preference. As I grew older into my teens, these feelings grew to encompass ideas of toleration for religion (as much as an anarchist, atheist person could at the time), ethnicity, political views, people that choose to eat meat, or any other points which we were free to choose.

I can say though that my patience, understanding, and tolerance of ignorance and stupidity has grown smaller and smaller. I define ignorance as usually those viewpoints of people that are present because people have not been exposed to very many ideas. Often their friends, family, neighborhood, and/ or town usually hold a similar view and because this person has been exposed to mainly this point of view, they believe that this is the correct (and/or only view). Stupidity differs and occurs when one holds a view that is ignorant even when other information/ views have been presented to the person and they "refuse" to listen, consider, or accept a view that differs from their own.

I think many people often consider points of view that differ from their own with caution and skepticism (as I do), with disdain (those who do not like being viewed as wrong), and/or fear and anger (such as people like Kern). When you question people's views, especially ones that have held for sometime, or ones they share with a group, whether it is their family or friends, most people I have encountered are none too pleased. In some part they feel like you are questioning their intelligence. Others feel like you are attacking them as a person and all they have known. People are often threatened by change and ideas that are different. It in some way means that things done, ideas thought, words said might not have been as innocent as they once thought or were led to believe.

I do not consider people stupid for not knowing about how something could be offensive or insensitive to someone else. I do consider them that way if they try to close themselves off from considering what they did or said was wrong. I am also less likely to consider someone as ignorant of issues if they themselves belong to a minority group. My example here comes from one I share and encounter often. Being part of the gay community I must confront ignorant ideas such as Kern's that I am a threat to the moral fabric of society. But I am also part of the Asian American community and must face issues of racism associated with stereotypes about Asians. Some would assume that since I am gay and work for the idealization of a free society for all people that other gay people would have the same view. I believe most people assume this because gays have been and are persecuted for something they did not choose. In this sense they should also understand racism and try their hardest to eradicate injustice and unfairness such as racism and sexism. I used to be that idealistic.

Most of the gay population in Oklahoma (believe it or not!!), are Caucasian. And most of these people have not heard or considered ideas of race. They really haven't had to. It was just in the last few years that the Tulsa Race Riots was admitted as occurring by the state of Oklahoma. And no, I do not believe that one's views of race greatly differ according to your class or education, I've met bigots from all educational and class levels. And while I've met more people in college that believe as I do, I also had the chance to meet plenty of ignorant and stupid ones as well. Another part of trying to tell people that what they said or what they believe is offensive to you is the extreme and and almost immediate anger they have towards your words. They believe that you view them as racist and an ignorant person. If you are talking to me or hanging out with me I seriously doubt that you are racist, but I do believe anyone, black, white, yellow, brown, purple, can have and/ or harbor racist ideas and stereotypes.

We in society are inundated with racial, sexual, religious, homophobic, ageist, cultural, etc, stereotypes. This is mainly why I abhor pop culture. When those around us reinforces those ideas because they live in the same medium as you, most people come to accept that idea as true, none the while realizing that people they may have ideas or stereotypes about are in fact ranging in diversity. I do not consider those who have these ideas as "stupid" or less smart than me because I realize how many Oklahomans have grown up. I WILL consider you as ignorant and even stupid, vile and disgusting if you choose to act as Sally Kern does and close yourself off to ideas that are different than yours. I will feel sorry for you for lacking a strong sense of right and wrong (called morals) to see that treating anyone unequally for something they can not help is unjust. And I one day hope that you love yourself enough as a person to know that everyone deserves freedom, equality, and respect in this world. But that will not happen until we look into ourselves and change all the things that keep this from happening.

'You must be the change you wish to see in the world.’
—Mahatma Gandhi

'Progress is a nice word. But change is its motivator and change has its enemies.’
—Robert Kennedy

‘The world hates change yet it is the only thing that has brought progress.’
—Charles F. Kettering

‘The soft-minded man always fears change. He feels security in the status quo, and he has an almost morbid fear of the new. For him, the greatest pain is the pain of a new idea.’
—Martin Luther King

‘A great wind is blowing and that gives you either imagination or a headache.’
-Catherine the Great

‘It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power.’
—Alan Cohen

And my favorite for many years now...

‘Never doubt that a small, group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.’
—Margaret Mead

Doublelicious!

So I am taking my little sis to see Tegan and Sara in Tulsa for her birthday! I love it when there is an excuse so I "have" to go. Check out there latest vid, it should be a blast!



"Back In Your Head"

Build a wall of books. Between us in our bed. Repeat, repeat the words
That I know we both said. Relax into the need. We get so comfortable
Remember when I was. So strange and likeable.

I just want back in your head.I just want back in your head
I'm not unfaithful. But I'll stray. When I get a little scared
When I get a little scared. When I get a little

When I jerk away from. Holding hands with you. I know these habits hurt
Important parts of you. Remember when I was.Sweet and unexplainable
Nothing like this person,Unlovable

I just want back in your head. I just want back in your head
I'm not unfaithful. But I'll stray. When I get a little scared
When I get a little scared. When I get a little scared
When I get a little
Run, run, run Run Run, run, run
Run I just want back in your head
I just want back in your head. I'm not unfaithful. But I'll stray

Song About My Life

So I am having an insomniatic bout right now and decided to share this beautiful song. I love people but seriously I wonder about a lot of them sometimes. I think this song goes especially well for all those past relationships as well. Maybe now I can sleep.



"The Girl You Lost To Cocaine"

I've stuck around, through thick and through thin
You cannot deny, I've always been in
But I've watched you stand, still as a snowman
But I don't see you change, you're always at meltdown

Yeah I've been your crutch, your smell sight and touch
Yeah I took you home when you've drunk too much
But I can't survive, with you by my side
See I'll never get laid, while I'm running your life

No I just don't wanna, so I'm walking away
There is nothing that you can do I will not stay
No I don't need drama, so I'm walking away
Yeah I am a girl with a lot on her plate

So just cut me loose, learn to tie your shoes
There's somebody here, I'd like to introduce
So look in the mirror, look for the glass
'Cause you're not my problem, you are my last

No I just don't wanna, so I'm walking away
There is nothing that you can do I will not stay
No I don't need drama, so I'm walking away
Yeah I am a girl with a lot on her plate

No I just don't wanna, so I'm walking away
There is nothing that you can do I will not stay
No I don't need drama, so I'm walking away
I'm just a girl that you lost to cocaine

Some Thoughts on Life

These past couple of weeks have been quite entertaining and satisfying for me. If anything they have re-affirmed the positive things that life has to offer. One thing I have tried to do over the years is stop being so co-dependent on others for my happiness. I was constantly being disappointed and hurt by others because I was basing what I thought of myself by how others treated me. Things like I was only good person if I was dating someone. Or I was smart based on whether someone asked my opinion in group meetings, and on and on. The list of little things we let negatively affect our lives can go on for miles.
These little things are often allowed to decide whether each day has been a good or bad day. Rather than see the day as a whole, we allow small actions or inactions by others to tell us who we are, what we are worth, and/ or how our lives are going. I am not saying that people or friends in our lives are not important, but we as individuals need to see ourselves in that way. How things affect us is how WE LET them affect us. It is hard to enjoy life when we let others live it for us.
It is hard for me to see those around me regard their self value and/or how well their life is going by whether or not they make others, who might not even view the situation in the same light, happy. Some of these people get so caught up whether or not their friends like or appreciate them they fail to realize that their so called friends are selfish people that rarely do take the time for things that do not benefit themselves. I know it is not easy to get away from this type of thinking. It has taken me years to get to the point where I am able to see myself for myself. Not how others define me or believe I should be. At least being aware of what you are doing will help you not define yourself through other people's eyes.

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, the education, the money, than circumstances, than failure, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company... a church... a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our Attitudes.”

Charles R. Swindoll quotes (American Writer and Clergyman, b.1934)

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”

Maria Robinson quotes

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
Sparrowrose

Howard Thurman quotes (American Theologian, Clergyman and Activist. 1900-1981)

“To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.”

Thank You Sally Kern

I am not shocked by this, I live in Oklahoma. One more example of the work that needs to be done and why who you vote (or don't vote for) really does matter! BTW, if you would like to leave her a message of what you think here is her info. Please do.

Oklahoma State Representative Sally Kern
Capitol Address:
2300 N. Lincoln Blvd.
Room 332
Oklahoma City, OK 73105
(405) 557-7348
District Address:
2713 Sterling Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK 73127
Email:
sallykern@okhouse.gov

My Month Has Arrived

I can dig this one. I hope the rest go as well.

In the coming week, you should try to experience, or at least visualize, scenes like the following: an apple pierced by an arrow that's lying on a bridge near a half-crumpled Valentine card; wind rattling through an old tree in such a way that you hallucinate there being an angel perched in its branches; an accordion floating down a stream trailed by two quacking ducks; a stranger who's simultaneously crying and laughing in a cafe while writing frenetically on white paper napkins. And why is it important to commune with scenes like these? Because they will energize your soul in ways you can't rationally understand. They will remind you that deeply meaningful events can be utterly mysterious.


From Free Will Astrology.