Sunday, November 30, 2008

Doing What Is Best

It has been that time again. The time when I evaluate my life and start chopping away at the cancerous parts that make it harder than it should be. In these last couple of months, I've done several things. I've remembered what it is that I love and gives me pleasure in life and I've gone after those things with a ferocity that made some of my friends wonder if I was loosing my mind. Concerts, great food, wine events, and some guilty pleasure shopping. I enveloped myself back into my spiritual beliefs and attended events with people that strengthen those views. I also reconnected with my philanthropic side and I have never felt better doing so. Whether they were complete strangers, a social cause, or just some attention to my own friends and family, most rewarding things in life start with your heart.

Those were the fun parts, the more difficult side of change and balance is finding the things that are not so beneficial to you in a mental, physical and/ or spiritual way. People that are constantly trying to bring you down with their pessimistic views is a problem I often encounter, especially in a place like Oklahoma. Most people fear change here and can react violently with harsh words or threatening gestures. They fear changes to their ways of thinking, they fear changes to the way they have known the social structure as it has existed and they fear change within themselves. I think most of these people fear change because it somehow negates a part of their lives they have grown knowing. Whether it be family, friends, the church, or just a view of how they treat and/ or interact with new and different people and ideas, it can always be disappointing and scary (whether your views fall to the left or the right) that what you thought once to be true is no longer.

As always, with this change comes introspection. A deep analyzing and critical look at your changed ways is always helpful and beneficial. Do the friends you choose to hang out with inspire you to be better or are they just the same as before with different packaging? Are your eating habits the best for you overall, or the most convenient? Do you have any ideological, religious or spiritual beliefs which are keeping you from being who you are and/ or keeping you at odds with other loved ones? Are there things (whether it be drugs, work, the gym, personal baggage, and/or personal views) in your life that are halting or completely stopping your short or long term goals?

Yeah, its not easy nor is it always pleasant. If anything, sometimes it is helpful to have someone you can talk to that will be encouraging and honest. It can be very hard to share your feelings and fears with people when you are afraid that you will be ridiculed, criticized, judged, or worse; that the person you trusted will try to use your shared faults against you at some point. Luckily, I've made in roads in a lot of these areas and have made some difficult and unwanted decisions. Mistakes will occur, but at least you are trying. If anything, be thankful for those in your life that uplift and love you. They are truly the best things in life.

Change is the constant, the signal for rebirth, the egg of the phoenix.
Christina Baldwin

Things do not change; we change.
Henry David Thoreau (1817 - 1862)

It's not that some people have willpower and some don't. It's that some people are ready to change and others are not.
James Gordon, M.D

Change has a considerable psychological impact on the human mind. To the fearful it is threatening because it means that things may get worse. To the hopeful it is encouraging because things may get better. To the confident it is inspiring because the challenge exists to make things better.
King Whitney Jr.

Nothing in the world is permanent, and we're foolish when we ask anything to last, but surely we're still more foolish not to take delight in it while we have it. If change is of the essence of existence one would have thought it only sensible to make it the premise of our philosophy.
W. Somerset Maugham (1874 - 1965), The Razor's Edge, 1943

1 comment:

Vesper de Vil said...

Ahhh I love ya already! I hope that your self-evaluations produce the most bliss and contentment possible. Blessings of the most unreligious kind. xo